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Writer's pictureStephen Burckhardt

Friday Funnies: Housework is Never Done.



Hello My Happy People,


I hope you have had a wonderful week and have great weather wherever you are so you can enjoy your weekend. I have been so busy this week and part of that has been doing housework.


The thing that is so tiring about housework is IT NEVER ENDS! You are never finished. Sure you might be finished for the day or even the week but sooner or later you have to do it all again. There is always more dishes to wash, meals to cook, and laundry to wash, dry, and put away! It helps when you have a wonderful partner who helps keep up the home but sometimes jobs don't leave much time for one or sometimes even both partners. So what do you do?


Don't stress about it for one thing. Do you have enough clean clothes to get dressed in the morning? Then do laundry tomorrow. Do you have enough clean dishes to fix breakfast, then wash dishes tomorrow. The world is not going to end if you take one night to relax and get your energy back. And in keeping that idea, today we have some jokes about ... you guessed it ... housework.


If you need a suggestion for what to do during your down time tonight, why not listen to my Beta Version FREE Audiobook of my award-winning Into the West: The Orphan Train on the Members Only page (<--- click here to join)? It's free to become a member, you can quit anytime, no strings attached.


And if you like podcasts, check out ours: Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt (<--- click here to listen). I have been busy lining up some great guests to bring on the show very soon. Be sure to check it out.


But for now ... on with the jokes!


Enjoy,

Dianne


Q: What did the vacuum say to the mop?

A: I’m so tired of everyone pushing us around.


Q: Who cleans the bottom of the ocean?

A: Mer-maids.


Q: How do you contact the spirit of a recently deceased window cleaner?

A: You use a Squeegee board.


Q: How was your first day as a street cleaner?

A: Not bad. There’s no training, you just pick it up as you go along.


Q: Are you interested in a vacuum cleaner so advanced it can cut your housework in half?

A: Interested? I'd take two.


Q: Why did you quit your job to clean mirrors in a factory?

A: It was just a job I could really see myself doing.


Q: What should you do first when you feel like I should clean the house?

A: Lay down until the feeling passes.


Q: What do you hate more than having a dirty house?

A: That's easy ... cleaning it.


Q: Did you hear that everyone in Britain prefers to use brooms to clean their floors?

A: Nonsense, that’s just a sweeping generalization.


Q: What are you when you clean a vacuum cleaner?

A: You become a vacuum cleaner.


Q: Why was the broom late?

A: It over-swept.


Q: Did you hear Bissell just created a new broom?

A: Apparently it’s sweeping the nation.


Q: My husband and I were arguing about whose turn it was to do the laundry.

A: In the end, I just threw in the towels.


Q: My friend asked me if I knew any laundry puns.

A: I said, I’ve got loads of them.


Q: Are you mad about Disney giving young girls unrealistic ideas about love?

A: No, I’m more annoyed that, no matter how much I sing, woodland animals have not once helped me with my housework.


Q: Are you into spring cleaning?

A: Not really but I’m not really into summer, fall, or winter cleaning either.


GE Big Boys - SNL


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