(P.R. and Stephen, 2013)
Hello Posse!
I hope you are all safe, happy, and healthy on this fine Saturday.
So, I got up today and about halfway through my day I realized I forgot to do the Friday Funnies blog. I was scheduled to do a video interview about my books serial yesterday and had spent all day getting ready for it. Since it was a video interview, I moved my office furniture around to get a good background, set up my books so they could be seen behind me, and put up a white board with all of my contact information on it to hang in the beside the books, and I even did a poll online to help me decide what to wear for it. Then it got rescheduled, of course. Murphy's Law!
It was also a day of IT issues, my dinner didn't get ordered when we ordered delivery, and the gas bottle I ordered weeks ago for our Soda Stream machine finally came but they sent the wrong kind of bottle. With all the hustle and prep and so much going wrong, the Friday blog just got lost in my fog. On the bright side, I am still doing WAY better than I used to before I set up the three day a week blog schedule, so yay me!
I have been updating my websites to include Chilean Spanish and German. So many of P.R.'s relatives speak Chilean Spanish, I would love for them to be able to check out my work. I am also picking up a few followers in Germany so I thought that would be a good addition. It is just a google translate app I added to the site so the translations might be off to a native speaker but at least they will have a better idea of what my work is about now.
But now, on with the blog! For today, I thought it would be good to do marriage jokes. Right now so many people seem to be struggling with their spouses during all the stress of the pandemic, civil rights unrest, and economic hardships. Maybe laughing about married life will help ease a bit of the stress.
I hope you like these, enjoy!
Stephen
Q: What happened when your wife found out you replaced your bed with a trampoline
A: She hit the roof.
Q: I heard you got divorced, what happened?
A: My doctor told me I couldn't touch anything alcoholic anymore.
Q: Did you know that statistics show that 4,153,237 people got married just last year.
A: Maybe I'm wrong, but shouldn't that be an even number?
Nurse: "Mr. Jones we are going to run a few tests. First, we need to get stool and urine samples."
Man to wife: "What did the nurse just say?"
Wife to husband: "She wants your underwear."
I accidentally handed my wife a glue stick instead of a chapstick. She still isn't talking to me.
Scaring men is easy, just asked your husband if he remembers what today is.
I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me, she said yes, me taking out the trash, me doing laundry, me mowing the lawn, me doing the dishes . . .
A retired husband is often a full-time job for his wife.
And because I am a HUGE Star Wars fan, last but not least . . .
Our therapist asked my wife why she wanted to end our marriage.
My wife said she hated living with the constant Star Wars puns.
I just look at the therapist and said, "Anger is strong with this one, divorce me she will!"