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Friday Funnies: Taxes!

Hello Posse!

It's that time of year again, when every adult needs to see if they will be getting money back from the US Government or will have to pay more. I was really thankful to see that first stimulus check this last year, it just covered my tax bill. I found it rather ironic the government sent me a check and then wanted almost the same amount back in taxes, which was where they were getting all that money to pay the stimulus checks in the first place. It's enough to drive you batty if you think about it too hard.

Given that this time of year is so stressful for most, I thought I would try to find something funny to share with you about death and taxes. There are actually a lot of great humorous quotes from famous people about these topics.

"Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even."

Will Rogers

“He said that there was death and taxes, and taxes was worse, because at least death didn’t happen to you every year.”

Terry Pratchett, Reaper Man

“The difference between death and taxes is death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.”

Will Rogers

"The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin."

— Mark Twain

“The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.”

Paula Poundstone

“He's spending a year dead for tax reasons.”

"It is a good thing that we do not get as much government as we pay for."

― Will Rogers

“Death, taxes and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them.”

Margaret Mitchell, Gone with the Wind

“The only certainties in life are death and taxes.”

— Mark Twain

Besides these quotes, many jokes have been made over the years about these death, taxes and government. But before we get to the jokes, let me just remind you that the Into the West Saga Serial books are available on and B& You can search by title or by Stephen Burckhardt. When you need to get your mind off of taxes, they just might help.

Now, on to the jokes!

Have a great weekend, posse!



-Personal drive and accomplishment is still rewarded in America . . . with higher taxes.

-America is still the land of opportunity, everybody can become a taxpayer.

-If my business doesn't pick up, I won't have to lie on my next tax return.

-Children may be considered deductibles, but they are still personally taxing.

-Income tax has turned more Americans into liars than golf.

-It's said that George Washington never told a lie, but then he never had to file a 1040 either.

-There is no child so ill-behaved that they can't serve as an income tax deduction.

-Congress knows how to make money, it puts a high tax on liquor and then raises the other taxes that drive people to drink.

-A fool and his money are soon parted the smart people wait until income tax time.

-Taxes are like Golf, you drive hard to get to the green and then wind up in a hole.

-Nothing makes a person more modest about their income than when it's time to file their taxes.

-Income tax is the government's version of "Truth or Consequences."

-Income-tax forms are like laundry lists - with both you can lose your shirt.

-Nothing has done more to inspire the writing of fiction than the itemized deduction section of an income-tax form.

Homer on Tax Day


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