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Notice: Due to the massive redesign and creation of Burckhardt Books, some internal links in blogs posted before January 24, 2022 may no long be active. If you find a broken link, please send us an email and let us know which blog it is in. We will do our best to go back and check links in previous blogs as time permits. But let's be honest, it's going to be slow going. 

Friday Funnies: Date Night!



Hello My Happy People,


It's Friday and that means funnies and date night. Every Friday, P.R. and I either order in and watch movies or play video games, or head out for a night together. Date night can mean anything from hitting up some local food trucks to a Michelin rated restaurant. The important thing is always just to spend quality time together.


So I need to hurry up and finish working so we can head out for out night, but before I get to the jokes, I am going to be doing a campaign for my birthday this year and I hope you will join in to help me celebrate.

It can be disappointing at special times of the year to be living here in Germany so far away from all out family and friends. We don't often get to celebrate milestones with anyone else outside of our home.


I thought about asking everyone I know to send me a card for my birthday. It would be great to see all those cards around the house with messages from friends and family I haven't been able to be with since 2019, our last trip to the US. However, the environmentalist in me hates the idea of all the time and effort needed for everyone to send a card that will just eventually get recycled.


Then I had a better idea. Cards typically cost anywhere from $1 to $4 on average just for a simple card. Then there is the time and effort (not to mention gas money) to go get one, postage to Germany, and then actually getting it in the mail. It's a lot of time, money, and effort even just to send a simple card. So I came up with something much cheaper, with less effort on your part, but will actually impact my life in a significant way.


My new book, Into the West: Family Ties is on pre-sale right now on Amazon. The book will be dropping on September 19th, 2023, my birthday. I have set the pre-sale price for the eBook at just 99¢. The price will be going up to the regular cover price October 1st, 2023.


So this year, in lieu of greeting cards, I'm asking for an ebook shower to help me hit the paid bestsellers list. If I can do this, it will put all my books in a different algorithm bracket on Amazon and put them in the results of more searches. This could mean more sales overall for me and my work and actually help get my writing career rolling again for just a few minutes of your time online and only cost you 99¢.


So how about it? Want to help me celebrate my birthday with an ebook shower that could actually impact my life and career for only 99¢? If I could sell just 56 books to celebrate my 56th birthday ... it would be a dream come true!


If you are in, just CLICK HERE to join my celebration today. Much thanks in advance!


But now .... on with the jokes!


Enjoy,

Dianne


Q: I heard you asked a date to meet you at the gym, how did that go?

A: She never showed up, I guess the two of us aren’t going to work out.


Q: Have you ever dated a communist?

A: Yes, it did NOT end well. Honestly, I should have noticed the red flags.


Q: Is it true your wife agreed to a date with you after you gave her a bottle of tonic water?

A: Yes, I Schwepped her off her feet!


Q: I hear you are dating a one legged girl who works in a brewery, is it true?

A: Yes, she was in charge of the hops.


Q: What would you call an FBI agent if you were dating them broke up?

A: He would my Fed Ex.


Q: Did you see the ads for the new dating service that just launched in Prague?

A: Yes, it’s called Czech-Mate.


Q: Son, do you know why you should never date a tennis player?

A: Because love means nothing to them.


Q. Darling, I am not crazy about your new beard. Have you thought about shaving?

A: I have. I wasn’t crazy about it at first either, but it grew on me.


Q: I heard you’ve been on three dates with a woman who works in a zoo. How's it going?

A: Great! I think she’s a keeper.


Q: Did you hear that oxygen and magnesium are dating?

A: Seriously? OMg!


And last but not least ...


Q: Did you know my girlfriend was dating a clown right before she met me?

A: I guess I’ve got some pretty big shoes to fill!



The Scientific Reason Your Wife Is Always Right.

Don McMillan - A Little More Dry Bar




Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt

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Listen to our podcast, Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt, every Wednesday. Check your favorite podcast provider for listings.

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Support Our Book Banter Buddies (2023 Guest Interviews):



Reenita M. Hora, Author, Creative, Entrepreneur (EP 78 & 79: August 9th & 16th)

Christopher (Chris) Denmead, Comic Book Author/Podcastor (EP 80: August 23rd)


Season 2 Past Guest Interviews (2023):


LM Wilson, author of The Last of the Spirit Drakes (EP 51: Feb. 1)

LeRoy A Peters, author of The Edge of the World Series (EP 52: Feb. 8)

C. D'Angelo, Author of The Difference and The Visitor (EP 53: Feb. 15th)

Val Collins, author of the Aoife Walsh Books (EP 54: Feb. 22)

Kirstie Page, Visual Storyteller/Artist (EP 55: March 1st)

Lance Steen Anthony Nielsen, Author of Diamonds in the Sky Series

(EPs 56/57: March 8th/15th)

David Gibson, PhD FRSB, Author of Planting Clues: How Plants Solve Crimes.

(EP 58: March 22nd)

Linaya DiNoto, Science Fiction Author of Lithaflora: The Chrysalis: The Forever After Series (EP 59: March 29)

Kelly Florence, Screenwriter/Podcaster and Co-Author of 5 books in The Science of Series

(EP 60: April 5)

Stephanie LaVigne, Cozy Mystery Author of Headlines, Deadlines, and Lies

(EPs 61/62: April 12/19)

Nzondi (Ace Antonio Hall), horror author/actor/musician (EP 66 & 67: May 17 & 24)

Benecia Ponder, author coach and bestselling author (EP 68: May 31)

Diann Floyd Boehm, Children's Book Author/Educator/Podcaster (EP 69: June 7th)

Angela R. Hughes, Historical Epic Fantasy Author (EP 70: June 14)

Donna Edman, Photographer/Visual Storyteller/Author (EP 71: June 21)

Wendy Jo Cerna, Inspirational Author (EP 72: June 28)

Sabrina Hammonds, Kingdom Connections Podcast and Media Agency (EP 73: July 5)

Ann Charles, Mixed Genre Mystery Author (EP 74: July 12)

Natacha Deen, YA, Adult, and Non-Fiction Author (EP 75: June 21)

Kammy Wood, The Modern Wordist, Creative Writing Consultant (EP 76: June 26)

Francesca Maria, Horror and Comic Book Author (EP 77: August 2nd)

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