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Notice: Due to the massive redesign and creation of Burckhardt Books, some internal links in blogs posted before January 24, 2022 may no long be active. If you find a broken link, please send us an email and let us know which blog it is in. We will do our best to go back and check links in previous blogs as time permits. But let's be honest, it's going to be slow going. 

Friday Funnies: A Helping Hand!

Hello My Happy People,

First and foremost, I want to thank all of you who actually follow me, read my blogs/vlogs, listen to the occasional podcast, and best of all, buy and read my books! I could not do any of this without you! Well ... I could, but there wouldn't be much of a point to it. You are the most important part of my writing career. Without followers/readers, I have no career. I would just be a person who likes to write for themselves, not an author.

I am not a person who is good at asking for help. I am really bad at it. I would rather kill myself doing everything on my own than put myself out there to ask for help. Most people think it is because I am a control freak, but the truth is ... it's not that. I don't ask for help because I have a deep and crippling fear that no one would want to help me. So instead I drive myself insane trying to do everything on my own. Unfortunately, when it comes to my books, going it alone is obviously not working.

I need help. I need people who will share my posts. I need ARC readers. I need people who will leave reviews. I need people who will buy my books and give them a try. I need an author critique group to help bounce ideas around. I need a better plan!

I am open to suggestions from anyone who has had better success than I am currently having. I am determined to figure this all out and make this a viable career, but it is obvious that I need to find a different path to reach my goals. As God is my witness, I will find it!

I think now is a perfect time for some jokes!

Have a great weekend people!


Q: Why were you shocked after reading a list of 100 Things To Do Before You Die?

A: Because "yell for help" wasn't even on the list.

Q: Are you thankful for student loans helping you pay for college?

A: Yes! I am so thankful don't think I can ever repay them!

Q: Is your dad still missing one Beatles' song from his collection?

A: Yes, he needs Help.

Q: Why did Chuck Norris called 911?

A: To ask if they needed help.

Q: Did you call the anonymous NSA hotline?

A: Yes, but I don't think it's really anonymous. They answered, "Hi, David. How can we help you?"

Q: How does leather armour help the wearer go undetected?

A: It's made of hide.

Q: Why do you donate your O-blood as often as allowed?

A: The blood donation office is just the only place I go where I'm everyone's type.

Q: Why do you like to chat while eating Italian food?

A: Because it helps pas-ta time.

Q: Didn't you ordered a deck of cards two weeks ago online?

A. Yes, it still hasn’t arrived. Customer service says they’re dealing with it.

Q: What did your doctor say when you told her you broke your arm in two places?

A: She told me to stop going to those places.

Q: Why is the evening news ironic?

A: They always begin with “Good evening,” and then tell you exactly why it's not.

Q: Are you a vegetarian because you really loved animals?

A: No, I just really hate vegetables.

Q: DId you talk to a doctor about your inferiority complex?

A: Yes, but they didn't say much. Apparently, it's not a very good one.

And last but not least ...

Q: Why do pirates need extra help to learn the alphabet?

A: Because they can spend years at C.

Gallagher and the Sledge-O-Matic

Carson Tonight Show/Johnny Carson


eBook on Pre-Sale Now

All Editions Drop September 19th, 2023!

The seventh and final installment of the Into the West Saga Serial, Into the West: Family Ties.

The eBook is on pre-sale now on Amazon for only 99¢. Don't wait, click here to order your copy today and it will automatically download on September 19th. Price goes up to $2.99 October 1st.

Want to help give Dianne a bestseller for her birthday for just 99¢?

The new eBook for Into the West: Family Ties is on sale for a limited time for just 99¢. Buying this eBook is a way for you get to give Dianne the gift of a bestseller that can actually help her writing career, but you get to keep the actual gift of a new book for less than the price of even a cheap greeting card and no postage required! Click here for details.

Book Banter Magazine is coming Oct. 1st, 2023.

We are getting so exciting here. Our premier issues has loads of non-fiction and fiction including mystery, thrillers, scifi, horror, and anything that goes bump in the night kind of books for young readers, young adults, and adults, all to celebrate our favorite holiday, Halloween! Plus I am working on literary puzzles to test your book knowledge and I am searching for a cookbook author to bring you tasty recipes as well.

Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt

Click the purple podcast icon to

listen to the current episode.

Podcast Links

Listen to our podcast, Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt, every Wednesday. Check your favorite podcast provider for listings.

Listen to Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt on These Featured Podcast Providers:

Burckhardt Books Pages:

Linktree, QR scan and go code

You can find links to all our importants sites in one place.

Plus, you can find links all the providers who carry our

podcast, Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt.

About Dianne:

Follow us on TikTok :@burckhardtbooks (click underlined text to go)

Support Us:

It's even easier now to support Burckhardt Books and our Book Banter with Dianne Burckhardt podcast, many options are no cost to you. Click here for more information.

Buy all of the books in the Into the West Saga Serial on

Just click HERE

Support Our Book Banter Buddies (2023 Guest Interviews):

J.C. Fuller, Mystery Author and TikTok Queen (EP 82: September 6th)

Meliza Farndell, Author, Coach, Speaker (EP 83: September 13th)

  • Meliza Farndell's Website

Season 2 Past Guest Interviews (2023):

LM Wilson, author of The Last of the Spirit Drakes (EP 51: Feb. 1)

LeRoy A Peters, author of The Edge of the World Series (EP 52: Feb. 8)

C. D'Angelo, Author of The Difference and The Visitor (EP 53: Feb. 15th)

Val Collins, author of the Aoife Walsh Books (EP 54: Feb. 22)

Kirstie Page, Visual Storyteller/Artist (EP 55: March 1st)

Lance Steen Anthony Nielsen, Author of Diamonds in the Sky Series

(EPs 56/57: March 8th/15th)

David Gibson, PhD FRSB, Author of Planting Clues: How Plants Solve Crimes.

(EP 58: March 22nd)

Linaya DiNoto, Science Fiction Author of Lithaflora: The Chrysalis: The Forever After Series (EP 59: March 29)

Kelly Florence, Screenwriter/Podcaster and Co-Author of 5 books in The Science of Series

(EP 60: April 5)

Stephanie LaVigne, Cozy Mystery Author of Headlines, Deadlines, and Lies

(EPs 61/62: April 12/19)

Nzondi (Ace Antonio Hall), horror author/actor/musician (EP 66 & 67: May 17 & 24)

Benecia Ponder, author coach and bestselling author (EP 68: May 31)

Diann Floyd Boehm, Children's Book Author/Educator/Podcaster (EP 69: June 7th)

Angela R. Hughes, Historical Epic Fantasy Author (EP 70: June 14)

Donna Edman, Photographer/Visual Storyteller/Author (EP 71: June 21)

Wendy Jo Cerna, Inspirational Author (EP 72: June 28)

Sabrina Hammonds, Kingdom Connections Podcast and Media Agency (EP 73: July 5)

Ann Charles, Mixed Genre Mystery Author (EP 74: July 12)

Natacha Deen, YA, Adult, and Non-Fiction Author (EP 75: June 21)

Kammy Wood, The Modern Wordist, Creative Writing Consultant (EP 76: June 26)

Francesca Maria, Horror and Comic Book Author (EP 77: August 2nd)

Reenita M. Hora, Author, Creative, Entrepreneur (EP 78 & 79: August 9th & 16th)

Christopher (Chris) Denmead, Comic Book Author/Podcaster (EP 80: August 23rd)

Carole T. Beers, Contemporary Western Mystery Author (EP 81: August 6th)


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